In March of 2022 our family decided to set off on the adventure of a lifetime – moving all 7 of us into a 150 square foot trailer and traveling the country.
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Have you heard of “deschooling”? Deschooling is the process of peeling away the layers of what we’ve been led to believe about education (a result of traditional schooling) and coming instead into a more natural way and understanding of learning.
Many families who leave the school system will take time to deschool, where they put academics aside to spend time adjusting to the lack of rigor, forced work and learning, and instead focus on relaxing, enjoying natural interests and spending time together. The goal is to establish family bonds and connection, and reignite a child’s natural love of learning.
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As a new homeschool mom over 7 years ago, I knew that I had a lot to learn. But I never could have imagined that first I would have to unlearn so many things. Having spent my entire education in the public and private school systems I was used to only one way of learning: being fed information through a qualified adult, memorizing and regurgitating, being tested and graded, then moving on to the next subject.
Naturally it made sense to me that our home education would look similar. Afterall, there was 13 years worth of information I was fed that I would now have to figure out how to feed to my own children. Realizing I had a lot to unlearn was a sobering thought, but its necessity brought about true freedom in our homeschool and family life.
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Remember summertime as a kid? Gosh it was purely magical. The days were wide open and long, and the air and ocean was warm. Kids ran free in the streets until well past dark playing cops and robbers and hot days were filled with lemonade, ice cream trucks, and popsicles.
Then September came. Sleepy mornings were replaced with early alarm clocks. Tank tops were tucked away in favor of shirts with sleeves and backpacks were stuffed with heavy books, gym clothes and squashed lunches. We said goodbye to the magic of summer and replaced it with homework, sports practices, and desks.
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It’s disheartening to come to a point where you realize that homeschool isn’t working. Many families throw in the towel and put their children in school because of the many trials and stumbling blocks they encounter. But what if there was another way?
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Okay, but what does a rogue homeschool actually look like? And how does one go about doing the unconventional?
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I think that one of the biggest obstacles to having true freedom in homeschool… to having a truly fulfilling experience… is leaving behind the constructs that have been built up in our minds by society’s version of a successful education.
In an age where many parents are starting to ditch the idea that students must be college graduates to be successful, there is still a general belief that children must go to school from ages 4 to 18. That they must complete grades K-12 and follow the curriculum and standards set by the schools and their governing authorities. The board of education knows best; what they deem necessary and in what manner it’s taught is the golden standard.
We’re living in an era where the world is moving and changing at such a rapid pace that even the internet algorithms are changing daily.
Traditional schooling tells us that children need to learn a variety of subjects, for 7 hours a day, for 13 straight years. That’s a lot to put on a parent who is stepping into the role of teacher. Yet we go into home education under the impression that we must follow in tune with the schools lest our children be “behind”. Or even worse, that as homeschoolers it’s expected we dedicate extra time to our children’s studies so that they would be “ahead” of their peers. But why are we even making these comparisons? Take your children off that field. It’s not “homeschool” vs “school”. We’re not even playing the same game.
True Freedom in your homeschool comes when you move past the expectations, whether it’s those of society, your family, or even your own. For those of us who were raised in traditional schooling, it can be challenging. Even after 7 years of homeschooling, I still find myself working hard to shed what was so deeply ingrained in me. Often, I hold beliefs that I didn’t even realize were there. But as I continue to question the “whys” and the “hows” of our lifestyle, I can see that much of what I expect and know come from my own childhood experiences in school. The good news is that if those things no longer serve your family well, you can ditch them for something entirely different.
It’s exciting that there is a whole movement of parents who are taking back childhood. They are ditching the norm and educating their unique children in unique ways. They are honouring childhood for what it is: a time of innocence, curiosity, and fun. That’s not to say that there isn’t structure – it’s just that by putting family first, we’re better able to serve our children’s individual needs, give them a beautiful childhood, and raise up strong, confident men and women who have soaked in 18 years of truth, beauty and goodness.
If you want to break out of the tiny, constricting box of the American standard, try asking yourself these questions:
This should be the basis of your homeschool. If what you’re doing isn’t serving these two goals, then perhaps you need to reevaluate and try something new. It’s not always easy; families are complex things and nothing will ever be perfect. But your homeschool can be more beautiful, and it certainly can feel more free.
Break free, my friend. Break free.
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